Chorus of tears
/
I posted on our base's facebook page a while back to see if anyone had an old boom box they weren't using anymore.
Who calls it that still? A boombox? Is that still at thing?
A gal gave us hers, with the caveat that it only takes batteries. They weren't sure of the location of the plug.
I bought a couple cd's for the boys for Christmas. My sister had bought a CD for Judah a few Christmases ago. It was the first CD in the "Hidden In My Heart" albums. We started playing it for him when he was about 3, at night when we'd put him in bed. It calmed him and helped him be still and obedient to stay in bed while he fell asleep. Many many nights I would lay in bed with him and listen to the soft voices sing words straight from scripture. Not in the stereotypical, kiddy, campy way, but in beautiful, peaceful lullabies. Here's the link, in case you are interested - and it's a link because I don't know how else to post it
http://www.amazon.com/Hidden-In-My-Heart-Scripture/dp/B004OBGJHE
I have a strong association with the songs on that CD to our time in Florida and those nights in Judah's little toddler bed, watching him dance his tiny hands around in the dark to those songs. He's lean over and stroke my face and breath on me and say something sweet with that adorable lisp. When we moved here and our household goods finally arrived, I set that CD player up for Judah in his room and turned the CD on. I wept, immediately, my heart still longing for Florida.
Through transition over the past 18 months that CD and CD player are now in Joel's room. He loves it and Judah has been asking for it consistently. The burned duplicate of it didn't work in the CD players, so I got on to purchase another and found the second two albums. Turns out the CD player doesn't work at all, not just with the burned CD. So I asked on facebook.
Josh brought it home tonight, heavy with 6 D batteries that I was enthusiastic to replace. I sat it down next to me to dig through a tangled heap of leftover plugs, cords and cables that managed to survive the last purging of the junk drawer. I took a look at the AC input and rummaged around. None would work. I started putting all the cables back in and saw a grey plug that I hadn't seen before - with a perfect matching AC input. It slipped into place with a little persuasion and the CD player came to life. Judah ran across the room and threw his arms around me and climbed to sit on my lap. He rocked back and forth on my lap as we listened to the music play through his new CD player.
Tonight was the first time we listened to album 2 of Hidden In My Heart. He scooted in as close as possible and nuzzled his head under my chin. I ran my fingers over and over again through his thick, straight hair, closed my eyes and let the tears come. They dripped in a steady flow on the pillow he'd put on the bed for me to rest my head on. He talked about Ms.Debby - his Sunday school teacher at our church in Florida. He talked about Nora Jane, his best friend in Florida. The first love of his heart. We talked about the first CD and how we used to do hand dances to the songs in his little bed in the Florida house. He asked me again, "Can't we ever go back to Florida?" My tears soaked his pillow. They fell for Florida. They fell for the cherished memories of a tiny little boy with whispery soft blond hair in a toddler bed in our house in Florida. A boy with a perfectly delightful lisp and intricate dancing hands. They fell for friendships in that season. They fell for the blessings that abounded in that season. They fell for a hurting mama heart, that her little blond boy is growing entirely too quickly. They fell for memories of pulling a blond baby in a wagon in the backyard in Florida and taking that baby boy and his beloved older brother to the beach in Florida. They fell for change and the sadness that accompanies that, but also for the joy that is available.
They fell because I'm a mama and my babies are growing up. That's why they fell as I breathed in deep the smell of my precious boy and listened to the soft chorus of scripture filling his room.
Who calls it that still? A boombox? Is that still at thing?
A gal gave us hers, with the caveat that it only takes batteries. They weren't sure of the location of the plug.
I bought a couple cd's for the boys for Christmas. My sister had bought a CD for Judah a few Christmases ago. It was the first CD in the "Hidden In My Heart" albums. We started playing it for him when he was about 3, at night when we'd put him in bed. It calmed him and helped him be still and obedient to stay in bed while he fell asleep. Many many nights I would lay in bed with him and listen to the soft voices sing words straight from scripture. Not in the stereotypical, kiddy, campy way, but in beautiful, peaceful lullabies. Here's the link, in case you are interested - and it's a link because I don't know how else to post it
http://www.amazon.com/Hidden-In-My-Heart-Scripture/dp/B004OBGJHE
I have a strong association with the songs on that CD to our time in Florida and those nights in Judah's little toddler bed, watching him dance his tiny hands around in the dark to those songs. He's lean over and stroke my face and breath on me and say something sweet with that adorable lisp. When we moved here and our household goods finally arrived, I set that CD player up for Judah in his room and turned the CD on. I wept, immediately, my heart still longing for Florida.
Through transition over the past 18 months that CD and CD player are now in Joel's room. He loves it and Judah has been asking for it consistently. The burned duplicate of it didn't work in the CD players, so I got on to purchase another and found the second two albums. Turns out the CD player doesn't work at all, not just with the burned CD. So I asked on facebook.
Josh brought it home tonight, heavy with 6 D batteries that I was enthusiastic to replace. I sat it down next to me to dig through a tangled heap of leftover plugs, cords and cables that managed to survive the last purging of the junk drawer. I took a look at the AC input and rummaged around. None would work. I started putting all the cables back in and saw a grey plug that I hadn't seen before - with a perfect matching AC input. It slipped into place with a little persuasion and the CD player came to life. Judah ran across the room and threw his arms around me and climbed to sit on my lap. He rocked back and forth on my lap as we listened to the music play through his new CD player.
Tonight was the first time we listened to album 2 of Hidden In My Heart. He scooted in as close as possible and nuzzled his head under my chin. I ran my fingers over and over again through his thick, straight hair, closed my eyes and let the tears come. They dripped in a steady flow on the pillow he'd put on the bed for me to rest my head on. He talked about Ms.Debby - his Sunday school teacher at our church in Florida. He talked about Nora Jane, his best friend in Florida. The first love of his heart. We talked about the first CD and how we used to do hand dances to the songs in his little bed in the Florida house. He asked me again, "Can't we ever go back to Florida?" My tears soaked his pillow. They fell for Florida. They fell for the cherished memories of a tiny little boy with whispery soft blond hair in a toddler bed in our house in Florida. A boy with a perfectly delightful lisp and intricate dancing hands. They fell for friendships in that season. They fell for the blessings that abounded in that season. They fell for a hurting mama heart, that her little blond boy is growing entirely too quickly. They fell for memories of pulling a blond baby in a wagon in the backyard in Florida and taking that baby boy and his beloved older brother to the beach in Florida. They fell for change and the sadness that accompanies that, but also for the joy that is available.
They fell because I'm a mama and my babies are growing up. That's why they fell as I breathed in deep the smell of my precious boy and listened to the soft chorus of scripture filling his room.