So wildly out of control

I redid/organized/finally finished four rooms in our house yesterday.  The downstairs bathroom looks completely different (and is a teeny ocean escape - as much as a bathroom can be...) The craft room looks SLIGHTLY less... I don't know - I hung a curtain and put up a chiffon garland so it's a teeny prettier.  Elijah and Judah's room is "decorated" and organized and the costume box is FINALLY out of the hall closet so that there's space in there for Elijah's quiet times in the afternoon while everyone else naps (it's a big closet - don't judge)

I finished the bathroom downstairs last, toward the end of the afternoon yesterday and stood looking at it thankful that it finally looked the way I wanted it - I am in control of the way that bathroom looks.  For the most part.
I turned and went back to the kitchen to talk to Josh and thought out loud to him, "I wonder a bit if my organizing/decorating frenzy today (though it wasn't a frantic frenzy) is just me grasping at straws."  He nodded and replied, "like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic."   I chuckled, "Yes, like that."  
Wednesday is the deadline - we know the decision has been made, but we've not been told yet.  Either we stay together as a family or the boys and I leave and any one of a dozen different scenarios follows.  There is quite literally NO way to prepare for what we will here - Everything is in flux here, and even at home where we planned to return if we are told we have to go.  
While doing a quite time this morning I read this article.  This "suffering" we are experiencing holds no candle to the suffering that Job experienced.  Amidst all the physical confusion that my body is experiencing and the emotional strain of preparing our hearts for whatever the good Lord (I do not say that irreverently) has laid out for us and the usual day to day stresses that cross my mind like marching elephant every night when I'm closing my eyes to sleep - it, at times, seems difficult to notice anything else - I just loved the end of this article.  It resonated so much with where I fight to be.

"In August 2011, Ted Olsen, senior editor at Christianity Today, memorably summarized Job in a tweet:

Job in a nutshell: Job: Why? Friends: You sinned. Job: No I didn't. God: Look at the cool animals!

— Ted Olsen (@tedolsen) August 12, 2011
Does that seem too trivial, too trite, too superficial? It is none of those. It is the incredible way our Creator grabs our attention and soothes our sorrows.

I'm humbled and grateful that I've finally reached a point in my maturity where even in the midst of confusion and trails I'm able to see "the cool animals".  That has been a long, slow process.  Thank you, Lord, for helping me grow.  There are truly incredible things to notice - even locked down on a small plot of land for seven.straight.months!  The Lord works in beautiful ways!

"The God who dried Job’s tears with a tornado answers us with a hundred riddles and with a litany of indecipherable mysteries and a catalogue of natural absurdities and animal wonders to fill our imaginations with awe and wonder that cannot answer our questions, but somehow work together to quiet and humble and satisfy our hearts. “The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things that are revealed belong to us and to our children forever” (Deuteronomy 29:29) — and the riddles he reveals are more than enough to inspire our trust in his sovereign goodness in governing all things, even when the specific why of our suffering remains a mystery.

We can trust as we wait for those answers, for the timeless riddles of God are always more satisfying than the microwaved answers of man."