Missions - gearing up to leave, part 1

I’m stretched out along our patio loveseat taking in this sticky midwest evening. The crickets have found their evening rhythm, the cicadas join the song every now and then, the robins are singing their goodnight lullabies, the hot breeze is blowing through our beautiful trees and dozens of fireflies are flitting their way around the yard. Cherry is on guard, with ears perked, ready to charge any bunny who dares venture out after their bedtime. We only have a short time left to call her ours. She is a remarkably good dog. Really, almost the best they come. I recognize that, but I do think that it’s been the Lord’s mercy that I haven’t grown very attached to her. I didn’t expect it to be that way, as I was very attached to all my family pets growing up, but I’m thankful that hasn’t happened with her as it would make the leaving even harder. Still, it’s sad. She’ll go to Josh’s parents who adore her and will spoil her rotten, and that helps my heart.
We listed the house yesterday and with is has come a tidal wave of emotions for me. I broke down as we discussed the various people who want to come look at it tomorrow, letting tears soak my face as I told Josh, “it’s just so painful”. He tenderly apologized that he couldn’t completely relate with what my heart felt, as he doesn’t feel as deeply about these things as I do. He later told me that he feels that’s the Lord’s mercy, that it’s a gift, and I agree with him. He’s a rock for me in our moves, he’s always been. He moves on from one place to another with full confidence that the Lord has gone before us, preparing a place for us, just as he’s always proven to do. It helped my heart to hear his reminder of this, even as we prepare to leave being this near to family. I’ve grown to love this house. We bought it because it was within walking distance of Josh’s parents and after being so far from family for so long, that was a deal maker for us! (Plus, the yard is INCREDIBLE! And, I’m proud to say, we’ve made it better than it was.)

I don’t have time to go back and read my previous posts, but I don’t believe I explained our timeframe for being overseas. Josh and I have never felt the Lord was calling us to stay in the States for long after leaving the military. We’ve been praying since the very beginning about being career missionaries, retiring off the field, or not retiring at all. Africa will be our home, we hope, just as much as America is right now. We are naive and who knows if this will happen as the Lord is the one who directs our steps, but we are following in obedience, feeling like this move is much more final than any of our previous. We will return to the States from time to time, but only for shorts stays. With that in mind, we ordered a cargo trailer from a local company several weeks ago after discussing what to do with the family heirloom furniture and belongings we didn’t want to give away or donate. There are enough large pieces, and monthly storage units are expensive enough that it made more sense to just order a trailer. Josh’s oldest brother kindly agreed to keep it on his large acreage in Wyoming. Josh picked it up a couple of days ago, and reality sunk in even a little more with its arrival. We’ve shifted gears a bit in our thinking about what to pack into it. Initially it was only going to be for family heirlooms but we are hoping to put way the money we take from this house until we are ready to come home on “furlough” (home assignment) in 3-4 years and buy a little bungalow of a house to have for when we return to the States every now and then. Many of the missionaries we’ve spoken to have little homes like this, and it’s been recommended to us by them and “senders” from here that have close relationships with missionaries who are regularly returning to the States for short stays. So, now the thinking is “how much can we fit in there?” The more furniture that we can’t take to Africa with us, but that we can fit in the trailer, the less we have to buy if we do end up purchasing a little house. There’s something to be said for leaving nothing behind and having no “tethers”, but the Lord has mercifully given us peace about this decision and it’s honestly been a relief to my heart to know there will be a trailer here with some of the pieces of furniture that hold dear memories for us - things we’ve had since the very beginning of our marriage, and some even from before. Our custom made Amish crib, changing dresser and rocker will go in, to hopefully be passed down to one of our boys when they begin a family. All our boys have slept in that crib. All have been nursed and rocked in that chair.

We are allowed a certain number of “crates” that will load into a shipping container. We are very familiar with the odd size of these crates from all our overseas military moves, so we are trying to frame our packing around our knowledge. Our location is unique for this, as many only allow what can be carried in a suitcase. Talk about leaving everything behind! Our team on the ground there has been incredible with helping us know what would be beneficial to bring and what to not bother with. Our bikes have to stay as the roads are heavily pockmarked and traffic is NOT safe, and that is a sad thing for all of us. We love our bikes! But they will be waiting in the trailer for when we are back on home assignment. The majority of the other stuff that has to stay are the various items I’ve used to decorate our many homes. I’ve had to constantly be checking my heart in this matter, as I’ve grown quite attached to these objects, simply because they are familiar and they hold deep nostalgic value to me. This isn’t inherently bad, but I have to be careful how much value I am placing on them, as it’s all just stuff. I need to be able to let it go. That being said, it will be really strange to “set up shop” without the majority of our familiar things that have always made my boys say, “Now it looks like home!”
My precious friend and I, (the wife of the other family that is teaming with us and arriving on the ground just a couple of months ahead of us) have been immensely blessed by the openness, time, energy and thought put into the Marco Polo messages from the ladies on the team in the village, helping us understand the local cuisine, what to bring as comfort food if there’s crate space, what the dress code is and how much clothing to pack if possible and various other details. I’m certain I would feel like I was floundering without the countless hours they’ve put in to answering our questions and popping on every now and then to tell us something they thought of! What a tremendous blessing! With some of the knowledge they gave us way back in February/March, I picked up my sewing game and decided to buckle down and learn to sew garments. I’ve dabbled in it now and then, but aside from simple 3 pattern piece baby shorts and the baby booties I used to make, I’d never used a cut out pattern and packet of instructions to put something together. I’ve always had a love for anything made from flax linen, and started searching the web for linen skirts. Linen, if you aren’t familiar with how it wears, is lightweight, flowy, incredibly breathable, dries relatively quickly and gets softer and drapes more beautifully with every wash and wear. Problem is, though it was the run of the mill garment cloth way back when, it’s become quite expensive, and handmade garments made from it that are available online are often unaffordable, especially in the floor length skirt styles I was looking into. So, I hunted for a pattern and fired up my sewing machine. Many, MANY skirts later, my linen addiction is flourishing and I’ll have skirts to share and enough new knowledge base that perhaps I can make them for the women there. I have no idea if that’s a thing, but I hope it is! What fun it would be to introduce a fabric that isn’t available there, in a style they aren’t accustomed to. Again, I’m naive to how much of this works. We may get there and I may find it laughable, the hours I spent sewing cute skirts. But they’ve been fun, Josh loves them, and I’ve learned a great number of skills to put to use should be have trouble finding clothing there, which we’ve been told can be tricky.

It’s late, it’s well past my bedtime and I am currently scratching mosquito bites more than I’m typing, so off to bed I go. I suppose this is just part 1 of “gearing up to leave”.